I am, without a doubt, falling in love with Gwyneth Rose. All through Tricia's pregnancy, because of both the high risk for the baby and our desire to keep it a secret from most people for so long, I held back a lot of the emotional stuff that I would have probably normally have felt for the baby. And, with the suddenness and high emotions involving her birth and the few days following, I just never really had a chance to let things sink in, knowing and enjoying the fact that I am a father.
Even still, while I know that Gwyneth has a great chance at surviving all of this, especially with so many prayers for her around the world, I still understand that God could take her at any time (and again, if that is His will, I will do all I can to accept it). But, finally today, I was able to really spend some extended time sitting and watching and thinking over her, and she is absolutely taking over my heart.
As many of you have noted, my White Rose is incredibly beautiful. Even her nurses (and I'm sure they have to say this about every baby) seem to be taking special note of her. She was sleeping all the time, every time I went to see her today, and it's amazing just to watch her face. She yawns, and wiggles her ears, and scrunches her eyebrows (yes, she has eyebrows already) and opens and closes her eyes whenever she hears my voice or feels my touch. It's simply amazing!
And, when I wasn't with Gwyneth, I was spending most of my time with Tricia, who was incredibly responsive today. She also opens her eyes whenever she hears my voice. I was constantly at her side the moment she moved. She responds to my questions and stories with nods, smiles, frowns and nose scrunches. She even puckered her lips for a kiss when I was telling her about how beautiful Gwyneth is and how proud I am of Tricia (which of course, made me cry). And, she held her eyes open long enough for me to get a few Gwyneth pictures in front of her...not sure if she could see them or if she'll remember, but it was good nonetheless.
They reduced the amount of one of Tricia's sedatives in the morning, which is why she was so responsive today. She did fairly well, but her breathing becomes faster as her conscious becomes more aware of the vent, so they had her back to her previous levels of sedative by the end of the day.
I'm not sure if the transplant team ever came by...I'll be sure to ask about that tomorrow. They were able to suction a lot of stuff out of her lungs, which again, is a great thing. And, her heart rate stayed consistantly below 100, which is great and surprising (to me).
Gwyneth is continuing to do well. No word yet on the CF screening, and no poops. But, they are going to begin the tiniest bit of feedings tomorrow. Just a few drops a day until they see that everything inside is working well. Tricia, because of all of the drugs/meds she is on for her CF, will not be able to feed Gwyneth. But, they do have a local breast milk bank (trying not to think about that one too much) that they will draw from for her.
So, tomorrow marks one week that Gwyneth has been awake and Tricia has been asleep. They both have an incredibly long way to go, and especially for Tricia, I'm afraid the worst is before her (with the recovery and transplant).
I want you to know that I continue to read every comment word for word, and appreciate every last one. I am amazed that I have yet to receive a negative or even attacking comment (there have been a few about us elsewhere), and it blows my mind how many new people keep showing up every day. I think I'll blog some more about this tomorrow. For tonight, Meka's already asleep on my legs, and I am getting groggy, so goodnight!
BTW...I'm pretty sure that K. Byrd is a girl...they run marathons too. :)
Nate
PS...just noticed this as I was about to publish. In the picture above, Gwyneth's right hand is saying "I Love You" in sign language...something Tricia and I do often to each other. God is good!
115 comments:
Your daughter is so beautiful. I look forward to her delicate skin being freed from all the tapes, and the day you can start changing her tiny diapers and clothes, then the coming months when she will be squirming, and rolling, and trying to escape and just be naked! She is lovely. I hope the day comes sooner than later that her mommy gets to enjoy her, for now we will all send love to her and wait for word that mommy is visiting her.
Thank you for sharing. It gives me one more thing in my day, to come check on your family, one more thing in my day to think about, and feel hopeful about, and to help me put my life into perspective.
My thoughts are with you and your family.
Apryl in NC
Nate,
I continue to pray for your family & find a closer love to God with each of your postings. I have to say that I am addicted though. I check your blog no less than 3 times a day, I know, Scary right!! Gwyneth is just too cute. I don't know your pain of a premature child but I am sure that it is one of the most difficutlt challanges that God has put before you, but I know that you will make it through this becuase you trust in the Lord for your decisions. My 5 year old has CF as I have said in prior post on your blog & I find it hard myself when she is sick to look to God to make the right decisions for her care. I was angry at first thinking why he had to choose her, why he had to choose me, why would he do this to a precious child--but then it occured to me, why not me-why not someone who believes in a higher power, someone who knows & has faith that God will take it in his hands to do what is best & give my sweet child to a mother who will love her no matter what happens & what challenge she faces in life. I know that you are goin to love Gwyneth just like this & you have proven that you love Tricia, unconditionally. I wish the world could have 1% of the love to share openly tht you had for Tricia, it would make it such a better place to be!!! Thank you so much for sharing your story with us & being so open & honest.
I do need some help to ask you if it is possible to donate to Tricias trust fund by credit card online or if I have to send a check? I found the form on her website but I am technically challenged so if you could please post a blog about that or email me that would be great. my email is my2girlsandmefight4cf@hotmail.com
--Bobbi
You're absolutely right. She is telling her Daddy she loves him. What a precious blessing straight from God!
Giving Him glory for another good day and asking Him to see us all through another blessed one tomorrow.
WOW!!! The "I love you" sign brought tears to my eyes!! It is awesome how God works!
Hope you get some good rest tonight and I will be praying for all things good for your girls!
LaDonna
I am so glad Tricia was more responsive today and am constantly praying for a day soon, that she will be able to be completely weaned from the sedatives and not fight the vent. I can't wait to hear if the transplant team came by.
Gwyneth is beautiful. I can't wait for the post where you share the first time you're able to hold her. I know you're aching for that moment.
Nate, I admire you so much. I strength in you I know can only come from God, but your faith also shines through each obstacle placed in your way. I can only imagine what this is like for you, and I can only pray that faced with the same circumstances I would be as strong. You are an amazing brother in Christ and I hope one day to meet you and Tricia..if not here, definitely in Heaven. :)
Nathan, rest well. You are doing an unbelievable job caring for your two girls. Just think, one day sweet little Gwyneth will find her soul's mate...I just started praying today that he will be like you. Praying without ceasing!
Aww I LOVE the "I Love You" sign comment! Yes God is good!
God bless you.
The pictures of Gwyneth always leave me speechless. She is such a miracle in so many ways.
Can't wait to read more on their progress. And once again, you're all in my thoughts and prayers.
Beautiful! Beautiful Princess I feel I'm supposed to do this. I have a picture of my daughter and I ask that you please print it out and put it so Gwyneth can see it. Tell her that I've prayed to God and asked him that Calypso can keep a special eye on Gwyneth and help her and keep her company when her daddy isn't there.
http://img86.imageshack.us/img86/2932/cal012si6.jpg
I hope you don't think I'm crazy, I've felt like I was supposed to do this for a few days but didn't want people to think I was wacko.
Prayers always for you guys
Melissa
xxx
Happy 1 week birthday Gwyneth!
Many babies born last week have gotten to leave the hospital and go home...in your one week you've gone around the world many times and you've been carried in love in the hearts of SO many people. God has already used your life to touch so many others and it's my prayer that as you grow you will continue to be a vessal for God's glory! You have been blessed with an amazing Mommy and Daddy. And you are absolutely beautiful!!!
What a beautiful family you have! I will keep your family in my thoughts and prayers! I just came across your blog from another blog I read. I am very touched by your story, as I had a friend pass away from cf 7.5 years ago. She taught me more about life than anyone I know! Your are right, adopted and cf people have the best theme!! Always 99.9% themselves ALL the time!! =) My mom is also a NICU nurse, and I get to hear about ALL the tiny miracles that are born into this world way to early, yet leave her NICU a miracle!!
Love,
Sabrina in WA State
I was forwarded your blog address last week and am now a daily reader. I just wanted to tell you that your faith, love and positive attitude are inspiring and it is quite clear that your family is touching so many people. I gave birth to triplets at 25.1 weeks and they are now healthy and happy 2 year olds. The strength that a tiny 1 1/2 pound baby has is astonishing and I have faith that your precious Gwyneth will continue to grow strong and come home to your family. I'm praying for your girls and that God continues to bring you peace during this journey. Thanks for sharing so much of your lives.
Hello there again. I have been following your blog since a couple of weeks before Christmas and continue to be amazed every day by what you write. I am praying for you all and thinking about you. Your blog has truly left footprints in my heart. HUgs. Louise.
PS: I noticed the "i love you" sign the moment I saw that photo!
Nathan,
I've posted once or twice before (I had a 26-week baby girl 4 years ago). In any event, one thing they may (or may not) have talked to you about is blood transplants. Even if Gwyneth does very well, she still may need several (my daughter had six in her 3 1/2 months in the NICU). The screening process for the blood is so long that by the time you realize you need it for her, it is too late for you or a family member to donate. So, just in case no one has mentioned it yet, if any of your family are the same type as Gwyneth, it might be good to have them donate blood - even before she needs it.
I just want you to know that we are still praying like crazy for you, Tricia, and Gwyneth.
Your girls are tough and will pull through with the help of God's strength.
We will certainly be with you through this amazing journey. One day you and Tricia will be posting and asking how to get little Gwyneth to potty train! You will be able to look back, smile, an marvel at how far your girls have come.
You are in our hearts and Prayers.
God Bless - Ashley Black and Family
Up, can't sleep so I had to check your blog again. You mentioned that you haven't received too many negative comments, that is wonderful. I know that there are people out there that have aborted babies at the age Gwyneth was....I remember the first time I looked at one of your pictures of Gwyneth with her little hand on yours and saw her fingernails and thought to myself how could anyone not see that a baby inside its mothers womb is a life? Thank you so much for your decision to keep this baby even though most of the medical team probably told you it would be best to terminate Tricia's pregnancy....I know in your hearts it probably wasn't a decision at all it was God's creation of a life in Tricia. Praying for you while you sleep and I can't.
Ellen in Memphis
Hi~
I'm amanda from Myrtle Beach not too far from your Outer Banks. It's ironic that you guys always seem to weather those hurricanes well that always seem to want to move through there;)
I've been checking your blog off/on for awhile, and I haven't the time to comment with the holidays and such, but I certainly have had the time to pray for you all, and that I am stil doing.
I pray that both the bodies of your sweet baby and beautiful wife continue on their path to healing and recovery, and I also pray for you on your walks back and forth between your wife and baby. At the end of your post you said "God is good!" Yes he is, and he will continue to be providing you all with what you need to make it through this, and how sweet that he used your precious baby!
The video of you and your wife's 7 yrs together was awesome, and the pictures you have of your baby are breathtaking! What an incredible gift your wife got you for Christmas.
Praying for you and everyone,
amanda
I got your link from my friend Emilys page. I have checked in nightly ever since which has been about 1 week now. I am so happy that both your girls are doing so well! I say a prayor for them nightly and Thank god they are doing so well. May god continue to bless you all, and may mama be able to see that little gal ASAP! A mama deserves this- I know I have three little ones and one on the way. It is just a special bond that should not be denied and is awful when it has to occur in cases such as this. God has it all in control though, and he is good!
This is my first time visiting your blog. I am amazed at your strength...the power of faith is really amazing. I look forward to reading about your family's journey and wish you all the best.
Connie told me that the NC chapter president of Newborns In Need has gotten in touch with Duke about Gwyneth. I'm so glad to hear that.
I kept waking up wanting to check the blog all night and managed to hold myself in the bed until 5am. I knew I needed the rest and if I got online I'd be up the rest of the night.
Thank you for sharing the most beautiful love story. :)
Good morning Nate,
Thanks for the updates and looks into your lives. I enjoyed the video and especially the picture of you and Tricia looking over your White Rose. That is an ingenious picture! We are still praying hard for you all. Trusting for the absolute best turn out for both your girls. Joe and Kendra are still in our prayers as well as Gabby.
Scott
Wow - You're one wonderful daddy and husband. I can see that God gives you the strength to go through this difficult time. But I'm more than sure, that not long from now, you'll again have your beautiful wife and baby to lean on as well. I'll keep you in my prayers - strength for you to go on, health for Trish and a loving, protective Hand over your lovely baby girl. She's still going to bring so much more pleasure and love in your lives. I'll revisit to keep up to date.
Hesté (Namibia - Africa)
Nate,
you are an awesome man, and it is easy to see why God has given you the 2 precious gifts of Tricia and Gwyneth.
I fail to see what anyone could find to attack you for the decissions you have made, Gwyneth was obviously concieved in love, and had you decided not to carry on the pregnancy, then Gwyneth would have no chance of life. The risks involved were all for Tricia, and as a mother myself I know I would gladly and willingly give my life for any of my children, so why would anyone expect anything less from Tricia for her unborn little one?
Your post mentioned breast milk banks which you said you didn't want to think about too much - breast milk in banks is a wonderful gift given by women. The time and effort to pump that milk can be great, but the knowledge that it is feeding little children like Gwyneth is what makes it rewarding. Breast milk is so much easier on little ones tummies, and because it is so perfectly designed for them there is much less waste product which means that their intestines and bowels have an easier job processing the milk. But I'm guessing you know all this already :)
Thank you for allowing me to share in your joy and travel along side you on this journey, know that I will be here smiling with the highs and here to hold your hand on the lows.
take care of you x
praying that Tricia will not fight the vent next time the meds are brought down.
the I love you sign made me smile...tht is awesome!
I wanted to tell you that you have not necessarily changed my whole pro life thought, but enhanced it. I have always been pro-life. ALWAYS. I believe abortion is wrong and never the answer. I would never choose to give the life of my baby away. That is wrong. However, I do believe there are some circumstances where it would be more "acceptable" to do so.
However, looking at the pictures of Gwyneth Rose ... her little fingers and eyebrows and eyes and skin. How could anyone choose to get rid of that? How could anyone say that a woman that is 24 weeks pregnant only has a "fetus."
It makes me angry that we have murderers in this state that can kill a mother and her "fetus" that is about to be born and they only get charged with one murder. Gwyneth Rose proves that even at 24 weeks in utero that the baby can survive.
So thank you for cementing even further my Prolife stance and for making me a little bit angry. I am so disgusted that people can get away with the murder of an innocent baby when they murder the pregnant mother.
Thanks for letting me vent so to speak. It just makes me so angry that the powers that be in many states don't consider in what many cases are Gwyneth's size a real human being.
God bless you for being pro-life.
Nate,
The bond between a daddy and his little girl is truly amazing - He is gentle, quiet, and strong and she will wrap him around her little finger. Even now (as old as I am), my dad still has those looks reserved just for me and I cherish every one - He was not able to put into words, they way you are, his feelings for me but I know that he loves me - If this is true of our earthly fathers, how much more so is it true of our heavenly Father? Gwyneth has already wrapped God around her tiny finger - I am pretty sure He had that already planned out!!!!
You have already developed that special look just for Gwyneth, I can see it in your eyes -
Praying for all 3 of you constantly - Love, Denise
How sweet is all I can say about that picture!! She is so adorable. Praying for a great day!!
What a great post today. Falling in love with your little girl. As a only child, daddy's girl.....I can't begin to explain how that relationship sustains me. I imagine you are learning so much. This is God's way of preparing you to care for that little one as Tricia goes through her transplant, I believe.
Our friends say my husband is an amazing, involved father and he went through the same thing you are right now.
Oh my heart- I'm late to take the kids to school... I can't do anything until I get down on my knees and beg God to heal Tricia, and grow Gweneth, and give us all grace to accept His will. I have rafted down the Upper Gauley, and I could smell that campfire smoke! I am falling in love with your family... what's up with that? sigh- Please Lord, be glorified.
Amen
Im still praying for you and your family :)
i find myself contstanly checking your blog.
and you wouldnt believe how many people on the OBX are talking about how god is working a mircacle in your life!
Nate,
For years I wondered if I would ever be called, "daddy". Now in the mornings I hear that little voice chime in "good morning daddy". Being a daddy is an amazing (been using that word a lot in the last week) feeling, probably the best feeling I have ever experienced. So enjoy! Soak it all up. She is an incredible little girl and I still think she looks a lot like you minus Tricia's nose.
I saw her hand and thought she was showing the "rock on" sign, but now I can see the "I love you". :)
Praying for you and your girls today.
Gwyneth's Great Uncle Andy
That picture with Gwyneth make the "I love you" sign is just adorable. Something for the "Right to Life" article! She is so precious! I think it's so neat how she responds to her daddy's presence and voice, too.
I will continue praying that Tricia will be able to comfortably get off the vent and that the tx team will approve her for the tx. Yes, she has a long road ahead, but she has God and a very special supportive husband and sweet little daughter and that will make it all worth it!
Prayers from GA, Debbi (Aspiemom)
Nathan, I've been thinking about you having to stay in the hotel. Isn't there a Ronald McDonald HOuse nearby that you could stay at--usually you can stay for only $10.oo/ day. Just wanted to throw out that idea. OUr prayers continue to go out for all of you.
Praying that your little Gwyneth can have a BM soon and that the tiny amount of feeding goes well; that everything checks out how it should! Praying too for Tricia; that her recovery goes better than you could ever hope... I got choked up when I saw Gwyneth "signing" I love you. Little sweetie already knows her family! ;)
It baffles me to think that people do not believe in God when your family is such a testament to His doings! I'm listening to Miracle and thinking and praying for you all! Keep fighting girls!
You speak of how awesome Tricia is and how you are honored she chose you. By looking at your committment to them I think I can see why she chose you! You are so wonderful to post all of these pictures/videos/blog updates for the world that is praying.I cannot imagine how Tricia will feel when she wakes up and reads this, how awesome it will be for her to know what went on while she was sleeping. You are a great man, Gwyneth & Tricia are lucky to have you, you are worth waking up for and I know Tricia will do that soon!! Our fervent prayers continue to go up as we check the blog constantly. Praying that Jesus will heal his princesses like only he can do!
Praying in Chesapeake VA
I'm glad you pointed out that Gwenyth was signing I Love You- What A Perfect Picture for a Tiny Perfect Girl!!! I pray for each of you daily, often more than once...I hope Gwenyth gives you a poop soon :)
You are all in our prayers. May God Bless you!
Gwyneth is so beautiful - I can already tell she is going to be an amazing little girl. You will be astounded as she starts to gain weight and get stronger how God works. To watch your daughter grow like this IS a gift. I am just praying and counting the days when you get to hold her, and especially Tricia. It is a moment you will never, ever forget.
My husband had a chance to look at your wife's blog last night & his first words were "She is so beautiful!". Even without knowing her, I know she must be even moreso on the inside.
I have asked all my friends who prayed us through my son's NICU stay to pray for you as well. Several check in regularly & comment to me how amazed they are by you and your faith. You are certainly doing a lot of people a lot of good - by just being you!
Continued blessings & prayers to you from Atlanta.
Liz
I am new to your blog from Virginia and encouraged by your strong faith. I will be praying for you and your girls for healing and continued strength both in body and spirit. Both of your girls are beautiful! The way that you share about both of them is touching and your love for them is evident as well as your love for the Lord!
Please know my thoughts and many prayers are being said for you all.
Lynn
I'm so glad your girls had a good day yesterday. You are all continually in my thoughts and prayers.
Praying for more miracles today.
I have been following your blog daily and holding your family up in prayer! You are such a great example of strength and love for your family. You are right, the "I love you" sign (my daughter does that every day leaving for the bus) is so evident and amazing to see on Gwyneth's hand! Isn't it great the way our Lord works??
Sending ((hugs)) from MI.
The Davidson Family
Nate,
You have a beautiful girl there!! Just wanted to let you know that many prayers are being said for you,Tricia and Gwenyth from the great state of Michigan! God Bless!
ps Happy Birthday Sweetpea!:)
Your story, and strength continue to amaze me! We found out our 3 1/2 year old son had a tumor a week before Christmas, and we thought for a brief moment our world was crashing down around us. But as we stepped back and evaluated the situation, we realize that it could have, except for Christ. Although our pain, and worry, and exhaust, and fear, seemed to consume us for that slight moment, it was gone just as quick as it came. The Lord has comforted us, rocked us, loved us, and never left us. I will always continue to pray for your family. I am blessed that I have had your story to really uplift us, and share with others. Many prayer from Greenwood, IN
Amanda Oliver
Good Morning! Nate, you have become our hero at NHC. I pray that God will bring you another good day today. Still praying for ya'll and NICU babies and parents. God Bless and have a wonderful day. Love in Christ, Ellen
She is beautiful! We continue to pray for all of you. We are praying today brings more progress for both of your girls!
Love today's piocture!!! The video of pics was incredible! I wish I could know you all!
I found your blog through a link on another blog and now I am regular reader. My prayers are with your family.
Wow! I recieved an email from a friend to our moms Bible study to pray for your wife and baby. I just had to comment.
Our God is a God is miracles, the same yesterday, today and forever! Just know in Farmville, VA there are moms praying for a miracle
How beautiful! What a special blessing to have her signing 'I love you' in the picture :) God is good!
I can't wait to see the picture of Tricia holding Gwyneth!!!! Praying for her strength and healing daily! As well as for Gwyneth Rose and for YOU, too!
Nate, Gwyneth is beautiful.This morning is the first time I've seen a picture of her.Our internet connection went down right after she was born and we've just gotten it back.No worries though,the best connection has never failed and never will.Anyway,congrats on becoming a dad.We all miss you on Monday morning(Sundays too).There have been times you would have been the only one at the young guy table.From talking to your peers you are the only one with an excuse better than -I've just been being slack.Know we'll be saving a seat for you until you return.Your dad and Andy did a great job yesterday morning updating all of us on what's been happening.Know you and Tricia and Gwyneth are in all of our prayers.Your brother in Christ,Tommy.
Nate, Tricia and Gwyneth ~
I stand in awe of your story, your ability to provide inspiration to us all when it should be us holding you up, and your openness and honesty with sharing your very private and very personal lives with us. What a special gift... one that I treasure!
My own little CF'er ~ Allison is 4 ~ spent her first four months in the NICU due to complications from her CF. What a blessed and harrowing time. It's an indescribable journey of love and dedication, one fraught with the ups and downs that are the hallmark of any hospital journey. My hope for you is that Gwyneth's NICU stay is as smooth as possible...and that Tricia's journey to a transplant is uncomplicated and punctuated with moments of pure joy.
I think of you all often, and check the blog several times a day ~ even when I'm out, I pull you up on my blackberry and see what's going on. This is a powerful tale and you are a master at sharing it with us. If you ever decide to write a book about this experience, I'll be the first one in line for a signed copy...
You all make me a better person...
Keeping the Faith...
Paula
www.allysallies.com
I happened upon your blog before the miracle of Gwyneth's birth. Since then my children and I check in on you every day. My 9 year old and 6 year old have put your family on their prayer list at school and my three year old asks every day to see pictures of the "pretty lady and the tiny baby". Even my 4 month old stops fussing when your blog comes up. Please know we pray for you constantly and thank you for letting the miracle of your family out for all to see.
Family of 6 in NY
I love that sweet picture! Oh my, I can only see courage and faith in your story! I am so happy people around the world have been so good to you. I am incredible proud of you both! Praying and checking in many times a day!
Love, Michelle
Houston, Tx
I just want you to know we are keeping you in our prayers! I just wanted to offer a note of encouragement... don't worry about using the milk from the donor bank. They are extremely careful and it will be REALLY helpful to your daughter! It sounds weird to do that, but it is a wonderful gift from someone! Also, I imagine that some people have condemned you for continuing with such a risky pregnancy, but you made the RIGHT decision. God is in ultimate control of life and death! We'll continue to lift all of you in our prayers!
Love,
Neva in KS
I have got to start reading your blog BEFORE I put on my make-up! Your love for your family is amazing. God is using you guys in such amazing ways.
Signing "I love you" - how beyond precious!
Isn't it amazing how much love you can feel for such a tiny little person? I'm so glad you are allowing yourself to "fall in love" with your precious baby girl!I still remember the "falling in love" look in Greg's eyes when Allison was born. The love between a parent and child is a special gift from the Lord! And her sign language-what an incredible blessing from above! As I opened my Bible after checking for your prayer requests, I was immediately drawn to Psalm 8:2a "From the lips of children and infants you have ordained praise." Perhaps her message was not just for her earthly Daddy! :)
Our family is praying continually for Tricia, Gwyneth, you, and your medical team and extended family. It is awesome to see the moving of God's mighty hand in your lives as well as the moving of the Holy Spirit in the lives and hearts of so many who are watching and praying from afar. You are such an example of walking by faith, and God is using your testimony to touch so many! When Tricia wakes, she will be overwhelmed by the testimony she has given while she slept! I believe God is allowing her body this time of rest to prepare her for what He has in store for her. His plans are perfect!
Sorry to go so long, but I just had to let you know that as we have been uplifting you all in prayer, God has been using you to draw His people closer to Him and remind us of what is really important. Your deep faith in the Lord and your love and devotion to your family has served to help others reevaluate where they are and where God wants them to be. Thank you for allowing us to share in your journey and grow with you in our faith!
We are waiting expectantly for more miracles and messages from the Lord. Our God is truly awesome!
Love and many prayers,
Laura Edwards and family
P.S. The kids LOVED the video of you and Meka! It brought many smiles and more requests for a family dog!! :)
A friend of mine gave me your blog site. I am blown over by your faith in God's plan and your love for your wife and daughter. Congratulations on such a beautiful family. You guys have been in my thoughts and prayers much more than I initially anticipated. Thanks for blessing so many of us through sharing your story. We are praying for you!
Precious. Simply precious. You and Tricia were meant to be together...what an awesome team. I remember falling in love with each of my kiddos. They truly are a miracle...every single one!
I am wondering about your little Meka. Is she alone all day? Maybe there is a nearby church with some youth that might want to walk and play with a little doggie for service hours?
Is it weird I am worried about your dog too?
Hang in there, Nate. Praying not only for your girls but for your rest, sleep and as your Uncle Andy posted previously, headaches.
Have a Terrific Tuesday!
I just wanted to say that I think your daughter is absolutely beautiful. I came across your story on the BabyFit website where I was reading the birth stories of the babies being born. I'm 9 weeks pregnant with my first and praying every day to have a healthy baby. One of my husband's close friends had a baby who was as premature as your daughter was and who is now a healthy and happy two year old. I will be praying for your family and hope to read that both of your girls are doing better every day.
Nate,
Your family has been on my prayer list and on my heart since seeing the first info about it on the Worship Freq site. This morning on the way to work I was listening to CT's See the Morning CD and when I heard the song "How can I keep from Singing" it made me think of you. The joy and love of Christ that shows through you even at this time is so AWESOME and such a testimony of what God can do in our lives if we let Him. Thank you for the blessings God has given me through your family. You, Tricia and Gwyneth are in my heart and prayers.
Jeanne
Nathan, Gwyneth is, indeed, gorgeous! And she looks peaceful, even with all the tubes and attachments, as if she is fully aware that she is absolutely safe and secure in the palm of the Hand of Almighty God! Thank you for sharing the pics and video of Tricia so we can all get to know your amazing and beautiful wife just a little bit better. I think I mentioned in a previous comment that I am a retired ICU nurse. As I read between the lines of your posts about Tricia and her sedation and vent management, the fact that they are able to keep her as "light" as she is, to the point of being able to communicate with you as well as she does, is such an encouraging sign to me. Keep noticing all the ways God is saying "I love you"! And thank you for sharing all of those "little" things, that could easily be overlooked or written off as coincidence. Those simple comments of yours are helping a world to learn to recognize the hand of God in all of our lives each day. I'm contiuing to pray without ceasing...and continue to boost your "hit count" multiple times daily. Chris Tomlin words keep going through my head each time I visit here:
Indescribable, uncontainable,
You placed the stars in the sky and You know them by name
You are amazing God
All powerful, untamable,
Awestruck we fall to our knees as we humbly proclaim
You are amazing God
You are amazing God
I was recently put onto your blog by a friend here in Indiana. I'm unsure how she heard about you guys but either way...you have a ton of people praying for you & for your family from our neck of the woods. I'm amazed at your writings and the strength of your love for God as well as Tricia's. Gwyneth is nothing short of stunning in every way. I did want to pass on a quote to you that has been a combination of a quote and then a combination of a statement that a friend told me once during some very tough struggles in life. "There will be years that ask and there will be years that answer. In the end, God never wastes pain!" Try to remember that as you press on during these very difficult days. Keep your head up and your face toward the sunshine. God will continue to carry you through. Always remember to focus on the days positives. And you are so right - GOD IS GOOD! ALL THE TIME! Blessings to you all!
Angie S. in Indiana
www.AngelicaGraceDesigns.com/blog/
www.AngelicaGraceDesigns.com
You are all in our prayers. Your faith is astounding. Thank you for sharing your story, it is inspiring.
Deborah in Ireland
Nate- Once again, although we have not met yet (and probably never will on this side of heaven), I wanted to let you know just how much I am falling in love with your family! I check about 3 times a day to see if there is an update on Tricia and Gwyneth. I have been praying that God continues to work a miracle in your two girls! It is so neat to see your faithfulness to God and resolve that He will do what is best for your family! What a testimony to those around you. continue to stay faithful to Him. Remember that God rewards those who are faithful. Have a wonderful day with Tricia and Gwyneth. Tell them both that there is a crowd in Michigan praying for them to get better and grow stronger.
With love,
The Hager Family
One of these days I will remember to grab my klneex box before I sign in to check your blog...the I Love You..did it for me...
Continueing to lift you up here in Raleigh, and I will come by for a quick visit soon...
Kim
WOW! The I LOVE YOU in sign language is definitely awesome. I call that a God Wink...when He looks down on us and says "see there, I am with you!" That is amazing! I LOVE the pictures of your white rose! She is perfect!!!! I can't wait till Tricia can wake and see her little miracle for the first time! I look forward to that post! Thank you for taking your time to keep us strangers informed and know you are being prayed over constantly!! May Jesus keep you in his hands today!
I was just over at Baba's blog. She is a friend of mine here in Savannah. She wanted us to pray for your daughter. i came over to visit and see that we need to pray really hard for both your daughter and Tricia. I am going to pray for both of them. What a marvelous wife you have...I can see why she is your hero. Hang in there and take care of your girls..Sandy
God is definitely good, and you're right. She's doing the sign for love! Amazing. I've always thought that babies are the closest to God that we'll ever be here on Earth. Witnessing someone draw their final breath would come right after that, though. Both euqally amazing however their differences may be.
Holding you guys high up in prayers. Praying for Tricia to bounce out of this and meet her daughter. Praying for both of your precious girl's to be enjoying life, healthy and happy, a year from now. And praying that you continue to let God use you to share His love with the rest of the world. >:0)
Nate-Keep staying strong for your girls. I believe God will heal them and you will soon be able to hold both of them in your arms.
-Julie & Seth Nickerson
I always come up with nicknames for people. My son, Luke is Lukey, my niece Emery (the micro-preemie last Sept) is Emmy and I keep wanting to refer to Gwyneth as Gwyny. SO I apologize if my nickname is offensive, but I mean it out of love. Miss Gwyny is so precious. I just LOVE that she is already signing L.O.V.E. to everyone. I don't think that is coincidental, it's a GOD THING! I'm so happy that you are a daddy now. Isn't it great. Kind of amazing to relish all the responsibility that comes with parenthood. It is a huge blessing from the Lord. I'm addicted to your blog and check it several times a day, just to stay on top of the latest. I pray often for your white roses, while driving, walking ,doing chores. God is listening to all our prayers. May the Lord hold you in HIS hands today as you face another long day of back and forth between Gwyny and Tricia. I pray specifically for Tricia's breathing and that the transplant team will come by with their assessment today. Keep bloggin Nate, you have LOTS of people praying for you. I've been asked to give my testimony at church on Sunday and my whole theme is how the Lord is so faithful to us during trials. I feel like he is leading me to share your story with the group. So, know that you will have an additional "prayer crew" praying for ya'll once I get finished Sunday morning. Thank you for your transparency and honesty. Your heart shines through the trials. God is being glorified through all of this. Even though it might seem tough. I promise on the other end you will see it clearly. I want to leave this verse to encourage you today. To him who is able to do immeasureably more than we can ever hope or imagine to him who is in Christ Jesus. (It's paraphrased. Sorry, the reference does not come to my mind at this moment)
absolutely precious!
stil praying, praying, praying!!!
I just started reading your blog through someone else's and know I find myself checking it all the time to see how your girls are doing. I have been praying for them and your whole families courage and strength is incredibly inspiring to me. Thanks for writing and thanks for your faith and courage.
What a sweet little Gwyneth! Her story was my daughter's story, born @26 weeks. They are true miracles. I have lived it. I want to send you true encouragment. I can't wait for you to experience all the wonderful things that she will do as she grows in the NICU and you finally take her home. She is simply adorable. I want you to know that since my sister (Rice-aroni-ville) made me aware of your blog, I have been praying. Praying for your family, you, your wife and sweet, sweet Gwyneth!
There is so much more I could tell you about our experience, but I will leave you with this-God is Good All the time and I know that he has his loving arms wrapped around your wife and daughter.
I will pray for peace, strength and healing and the someone will come to know the Lord through this experience!
Here is my prayer for you:
Heavenly Father I pray for this family. I don't know them, but you do. I ask that you would give Nate strength everyday. I pray that you would give him peace. I pray for his sweet loving wife that you would heal her body in Jesus name. Provide for her everything she needs. I pray that as he shows her pictures of their sweet baby, that she would see them and know that she is amazing. I pray for this sweet wonderful bundle of miracle. I pray that she would be off the ventilator, that her organs would develop properly, that you would put nurses in place to care for her that truly fall in love with her. I pray that as they do every test in the future, that they would all be normal. I pray that every day that she is in the NICU, that she would progress. I ask in Jesus name that she would grow up and know and love you. I lift this family up to you. I pray for their extended family as well that they would be a strength to them. Thank you for your son and your love for us. In Jesus Name I pray, Amen.
We are falling in love with her too. The anticipation is growing to see both of your girls healthy and active. My family is praying for your family.
Nate,
Hello. I, too, had a baby who was in the NICU. He was a 37 weeker, but they cut my placenta during delivery and he lost a lot of blood. Once in the NICU they realized that he had underdeveloped lungs, pulmonary hypertension, and was surfactant deficient. He spent 5 days on a vent and 16 days in the NICU. He was born on January 29, 2007. It is ironic that I found your blog. I was actually searching for a poem to put on my son's birthday invitations and ended up on another blog and that blog referenced yours and here I am. I have to say, I wept last night as I read through some of the stuff you guys have gone through. It is so tough to have a baby in the NICU, but then to also have your wife fighting for her life everyday. I am praying for you, Gwyneth and Tricia. You have truly touched my heart. Thank you for sharing your journey. After my son came home from the hospital, I joined the March of Dimes NICU Family Support Committee and 5 months later became an employee for the March of Dimes. This organization is working hard to assure that every baby has a healthy start. I am not sure if there is a NICU family support program in your area, or a NICU Family Specialist in your hospital. I will check and see. If not, I will see if I can get the information that we give our families in the NICU and send it to you. If you want to email me albeve0926@yahoo.com and send me your address, I will try to mail you some information. God Bless you. Take Care!
She really is so beautiful! I can't wait until she gets a little older and you can tell her all about her start to life and the true miracle that she is. That's a great self esteem booster for ANY kid! I do hope you continue this blog long after Tricia and Gwyneth are out of the hospital and doing well so we can keep up with your amazing family. We pray for you many times throughout the day.
Gwyn is just prefect Nate. She is so pretty. Everything about her is just amazing. You done good daddy.
Good morning, Lawrensons! Here's wishing you a splendid day :)
Our family continues to pray for you and your family. It's amazing that God has allowed us to watch this miracle from afar. May the God of peace and strength continue be the foundation for your hope, and Tricia and Gwyneth's healing.
Good morning Nathan,
I am 1st always shocked how many people send you a message after you post. I am watching so i can be the 1st to comment..only kidding.
I am sure you can always use a good chuckle! It funny if you were unable to laugh you would cry. The emotions are so close.
I am in awe of your tiny little person. She is lovely.
I am having janet for breakfast, and the babies.
We are praying!!
beth
with your gift of pen...you have me in tears, again. You are writing the greatest love story, one day at a time! There is only one other story in blog land that I have given that title to...so you two stories are unique to those of us living our ordinary lives.
I KNOW what it is like to guard your heart for so long that it is hard to let go and love like crazy. It's awesome how God peels back the layers of our onion like hearts and allows us to learn and love more.
And this guarding of ones heart..is very common in high risk pregnancy. (I'm breaking out into song "harden my heart" by Quarterflash. sure you can hear it to as the music nut you are.)
Still praying for you three, and your families!
In Jesus' name,
Jane
Honestly, so tiny! Anyone who looks at a baby and can say they don't believe in God, well I just don't get it!
When my son was born, I had complications and nearly died. I had to undergo a second surgery and through the grog felt such peace. Afterwards when speaking with my husband I recalled several things that happened while under..the doctor saying I had a baby boy, my mom and exactly what she was wearing, and my husband showing me a photo of the baby. You are Tricia's eyes to the baby right now...she sees her through you and all your love!
Continuing to pray for strength for you all. God Bless.
Hello Again,
Everyday I wake up and can't wait to read your blog and see what remarkable things have happened to you and your family!! Tricia's fight and ultimate victory against CF has really touched my heart. I remember finding out that my nephew had tested positive when he was just 2. We all broke into tears and for weeks and months we tryed to come to grips with his diagnosis. Fevereshly reading and studying up on it, asking questions, going to CHKD for tests. But none of that brought the peace in our heart that we all needed. Your story, your victory, your faith and trust has brought us peace. Just seeing the pictures of Tricia's smiling face really makes us feel like everything is going to be okay. I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for sharing this very personal and inspiring story with us. All the best to you and your beautiful family!
Hello Again,
Everyday I wake up and can't wait to read your blog and see what remarkable things have happened to you and your family!! Tricia's fight and ultimate victory against CF has really touched my heart. I remember finding out that my nephew had tested positive when he was just 2. We all broke into tears and for weeks and months we tryed to come to grips with his diagnosis. Fevereshly reading and studying up on it, asking questions, going to CHKD for tests. But none of that brought the peace in our heart that we all needed. Your story, your victory, your faith and trust has brought us peace. Just seeing the pictures of Tricia's smiling face really makes us feel like everything is going to be okay. I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for sharing this very personal and inspiring story with us. All the best to you and your beautiful family!
You and your girls continue to inspire me so much every day! How weird and amazing it is that my first prayer of the morning and night goes to a family a stranger, before my own for the past few days!?! Even after spending 2 nights in the ER with my precious daughter who had a severe allergic reaction, and breathing issues, when I came home and prayed in my bed, my prayer started forming on its own "Lord, please take care of Gwyneth, Tricia and Nathan, and thank you for taking good care of my own little baby tonight!"...
Kim
Gwyneth IS beautiful!!! Like her Mama! Ok, she has some of her daddy's good looks too. ;-)
I'm glad the negative (CRUEL) people are leaving you guys alone on here! I have prayed for such!!!! It is amazing how much the LIAR has decieved people, isn't it?????? My hubby and I (he's a youth pastor) have been using your story over and over and over again--with some of our kids who think abortion is ok, to adults who say they would abort if mom was at health risk due to a pregnancy. My gosh, God is so using you guys! He is cool like that, isn't He!?!?!
We continue to pray!
PS: My heart is pleading with God for Tricia's quick healing/transplant---whatever it takes, so she can be with her baby girl. My mother's heart aches for her to have to be separated from Gwyneth. EVERY time I read your blog, even if my Miracle Rose is sleeping, I go and pick her up and hold her tight and thank God I've been able to be with her every day since her birth two months ago. Able to nurse her. Change her. Walk her. Rock her. Talk to her. Cuddle her. I dont' ever want to take that for granted. . .
"The will of God will never take you where the
>>>> Grace of God will not protect you."
Ephesians 3:20
Hey there, I just was doing some reading today and came across this verse and it made me think of you and your family! I am seriously addicted to checking on you guys and praying for you constantly! You are an awesome blessing to this world. Your family is such an inspiration to mine! Stay Strong! We here at Mercy Hospital in Oklahoma are praying for you!
Blessings, Tisha in Oklahoma
P.S. I love the pictures they are so amazing! Keep up the good work!
Hi there! My husband and I are both Liberty grads and we heard about your blog. We are praying...
Nate,
I've been reading your blog for about a week now, it was brought to my attention by my friend Susanna (Morrison) Cummings, who is friends with Tricia. I just wanted to let you know that your family has been in my prayers. This recent post really touched my heart, that Tricia was able to open her eyes to see a few pictures of baby Gwyneth...I gave birth to a premature baby (at 33 weeks) 15 months ago...to make a long story short, I was out of town, away from home and ended up having an emergency c-section, so I was not awake when my baby was born and my husband wasn't allowed into the OR to see her be born either. However, I was so touched that as I woke up from being sedated for surgery there was my husband, standing by my bedside with a digital camera showing me pictures of my baby girl (who was in the NICU). I praise God for loving, godly husbands who stand by the bedside of their wives, looking out for them. I pray for strength for you and your family.
This past Sunday evening at our church service we sang a hymn titled "Stayed Upon Jehovah, Hearts are Fully Blessed" and I couldn't help but think of your family and the tremendous faith that you have shown. The last verse was very encouraging to me and I thought I'd share it with you.
Ev'ry joy or trial
Falleth from above,
Traced upon our dial
By the Sun of Love.
We may trust him fully
All for us to do;
They who trust him wholly
Find him wholly true.
Stayed upon Jehovah,
Hearts are fully blest,
Finding, as he promised,
Perfect peace and rest.
Your sister in Christ,
Denise
You have touched us in Southern Indiana! Several of us heard about Tricia and the baby through Rosi Truex- who knows your dad, Rick and family (I think). I have been so blessed. I have passed on the website to several others. One of my co-workers at work told me also how blessed she has been to read your posts, your dads, etc. I am on the local pregnancy care center board (Christian agency) and I passed the blog on to them too-- the pictures and story may help some young mother struggling with her decision to have/not have a baby growing inside of her. We are praying for you, Tricia, and the baby. Thanks so much for your words on "sadness" in a recent post-- it blessed me. Your girls are beautiful-- thanks for sharing them with so many.
that is so wonderful your baby is going to be able to get donated breast milk! awesome! (and the best thing for her)
Nate,
I am praying for your family,thanks for sharing,as it brings me closer to God everytime I read your postings.The picture of your baby was beautiful,she is beautiful.
Besides my yahoo, your page is the first I visit each morning to make sure you and the girls are doing well.
I am sending up more prayers for Tricia. I really hope she can wake up soon to see your smiling face and gwyn's as well.
Healing Vibes are sent to Tricia!!
daddy's falling in love with their babies in the nicu is always so special to witness for us nicu nurses.
bank breast milk is awesome and perfectly safe. the screening process is way more strict and rigorous than even human blood supply ( i used to be a regular donor. also my 24 week son was nourished with bank breast milk and i credit his avoiding NEC because he received breast milk. really it is what those tiny tummies tolerate best. God bless the women who have donatd to your white rose.
I pray for your family everyday...I also pray that my sons are someday the husband and father that you are. What a great example you have set. Sometime soon your daughter and wife will wake to find their prince!
SIncerely,
Beth in Tennessee
Regarding the milk bank... the breast milk will be wonderful for her. I'm sure it is a little "strange" to think about, but it will be so much easier on her especially delicate system. They may even have some milk produced by moms of preemies... "preemie" milk is different from "full-term" milk, from what I understand. Isn't that amazing?
I am thinkful there are other moms who donate their milk, just for situations like this.
Hi Nate, although we live on opposite sides of the world, I already feel like I'm friends with you and Tricia because I am constantly catching up with your news and sharing your photos. I have CF too and run a transplant awareness charity here in the UK (www.livelifethengivelife.co.uk) so I am well aware of how difficult things are for Trisha right now and how important it is that she gets her transplant.
Your little girl is totally beautiful and adorable! I feel so lucky to be able to share your story, along with so many other people in the world.
I can't wait to hear that Tricia is off the ventilator and the day she gets to meet Gwyneth is going to be so amazing!
Just wanted to let you know that lots of us here in the UK are following your story and wishing good wishes for you xxx
HAPPY 1 WEEK BIRTHDAY, GWYNETH!
The world is so much brighter with you in it!
Praying for a BM (bowel movement) and BM (breastmilk) for Gwyneth. It is the state of health that may make it difficult for Tricia to nurse, unlikely her medicine. Check out this book where you can reference each and every drug she is on. Medication and Mother's Milk by Thomas Hale. He is the leading expert on breastmilk safety. I have cf and most many women with cf are suggested by doctors to not bf because of meds they take. Since the docs don't know and don't have time/interest to research it they go on what they consider the safer side of the fence- formula. It is superior to formula in all ways - medically proven - that's why the formula cans all have to say "if breastmilk isn't possible" yadda, yadda. Just something to ponder. I'm enjoying nursing my 6 mo. old so much. It was absolutely amazing when he was born how he came out screaming and knew just what to do on my breast and how it comforted him so. We are in the same boat as you in that husband had tested negative to 89 mutations. Well turns out our Isaac has cf. I hope her test comes back negative.
Let me speak up for Nate for a second.
God bless all you moms who are passionate about breast milk. (Nate's such a big boy today because of it!) But I'm sure he and Tricia have already done their research on the subject.
So, whatever their decision is (and I don't know) please know they probably don't need convincing right now. And if he has any questions, he can always ask his mom!
What a beautiful little girl Gwyneth is. I can't wait to see pictures of her in her mother and father's arms. Tricia, I am praying that the transplant team will give you a thumbs up for transplant and that you will get those new lungs soon. Being a CF patient, a transplant recipient, and most of all a MOM, I know what it's like to want to live for your child more than anything in the world. Nate, your love and dedication amaze me. My wonderful husband is with me every step of the way as I now wait on a new kidney. Having that support means so much. Tricia and Gwyneth are very blessed to have you in their life. I will continue to lift all 3 of you up in prayer, and I look forward to your updates.
I keep thinking how blessed we are to have blogs! Thank you for keeping us all posted and for all the updates.
Still praying hard for your beautiful baby girl and beautiful wife. I'm loving the sweet pictures (and the I Love You sign, how sweet!). I can't for the life of me understand why anyone would be so negative and critical. I, along with many others find so much inspiration in this. Your determination and commitment to your family as well as your amazing faith to our Lord is a testimony and should inspire us all.
On that note, Nate I am going to add your story to my blog. I see in the other post that it's ok. :)
Jen
Your daughter is so beautiful. I know it's hard having a premie. My premie was born almost 19 years ago at 2lbs 9 ozs...he is a healthy high school senior preparing for a new stage to his life. Hang in there. It will all be worth it. I continue to pray for the three of you. God Bless
That is so sweet about the i love you sign. I'm so happy that you've been able to fall in love with your daughter in spite of all that is going on around you. How precious.
i just found your blog - can't even remember how, i've been reading it so long! and i've never posted a comment to a blog, but you and your family have truly touched my life. it is just a true taste of heaven to see such deep faith and joy in life. i believe in the power of prayer and it is a privledge to pray for you. thank you for sharing.
Austin, TX.
Nate,
I have not posted in here before, but have just heard of your story and can't stop following you all. You both are inspirations, and the "i love you" sign that gwyenth is holding up is AMAZING. it brought tears to my eyes. I am praying for all 3 of you and know that God has a wonderful plan for you. He has brought you so far, I feel that he has nothing but good things ahead. My husband had a heart transplant 5 years ago, and while it was one of the hardest things I have had to do, he continues to say that he is the only one he would ever want in that situation. I believe that Tricia has to feel that same way... she would never want anyone she loves to go what she is going through. She is strong, and well equipped to deal with this. I will continue to follow along. Thank you for sharing your story.
Amanda in Kansas City
What a sweet picture. My 7 yr old had surgery last month and we were waving the "I love you sign" at each other as they wheeled him down the hall to the OR. (He did just fine).
All my little girl's NICU pics have her giving the bird. Hee hee.
your daughter is beatiful and your faith and strenght inspiring and amazing. Will keep you in my prayers
That is especially cool about the sign she's definitely making! All will be well I am praying!
(Here via Beverly)
That's the first thing I noticed...her signing "I Love You!" It made the tears flow as sign language is my first language. She's beautiful. I pray and think about you guys daily. God Bless!!
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