Showing posts with label Gwyneth Rose. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Gwyneth Rose. Show all posts

Friday, July 4, 2008

Fast Track (Updated 7.4.08)

Welcome!

So, I figured for those of you who are just joining us and don't have the time or desire to spend the few hours that it would take to read through every post here, this is a good way to learn all about us in just a few minutes.

My name is Nathan Lawrenson (most people call me Nate). On June 27, 2004, I married Patricia Suzanne Kirschner (everyone calls her Tricia), and we began our crazy life together. We have been living in Nags Head, on the Outer Banks (OBX) of NC for the past two years with our dog, Meka and our cat, Ralphie.


Tricia has Cystic Fibrosis (CF), a terminal, genetically inherited disease that especially affects the lungs. When we were married, she was showing outward signs of the deterioration that her CF was causing to her body, and, with the support of her medical team, we quickly began trying to start a family, knowing that our window of opportunity was small.

In May of 2007, after a few unsuccessful years of trying to become pregnant, Tricia’s disease had progressed to the point to where her doctors strongly advised that we stop our efforts to conceive and consider undergoing the evaluation process for the double lung transplant that could save Tricia’s life. Trusting in our doctors’ abilities and in God’s control, and coming to terms with the fact that we would never be able to have our own children after that point, we took their advice.

All this time, since before we were even married, Tricia had been praying a secret prayer…it was even a secret to me. Tricia had been praying for a miracle baby.

In July of 2007, Tricia went through the week long evaluation process at Duke University Medical Center to determine if she was a candidate for a transplant. She was a candidate, and we began making plans to temporarily move to Durham, NC to be close to Duke.

The day before Tricia was to begin the physical therapy that would prepare her to be placed on the transplant list, we found out that we were unexpectedly pregnant. Against the advice of many of her doctors, we chose to keep the pregnancy, having been told that both Tricia and the baby had less than a 50% chance of surviving.

From September through December, Tricia did physical therapy five days per week to keep her body in the best shape possible, all the while growing sicker and more dependent on oxygen. On December 27, Tricia went into the hospital for what we hoped would be a short stay. The short stay turned into a long stay.

On January 3, 2008, because of her deteriorated health, Tricia was moved to an ICU room. During this time, Tricia was getting less than one hour of sleep per every twenty-four hours. The baby was just under twenty-four weeks old (gestation) and doing as well as possible.

On January 8, Tricia was taken to the OR where she was sedated, given a tracheostomy and placed on a ventilator, with the hope that she could carry the baby for a few more days. The trach and ventilation went well, but Tricia was too unstable to return to the ICU, and the decision was made to perform an emergency C-Section. There were 75 people with Tricia in the OR that day.

Gwyneth Rose Lawrenson was born that day at 24 weeks and 4 days gestation, weighing just under 1 lb 6 oz and measuring 12 inches long.


Following Gwyneth's arrival, Tricia was placed in a medically induced coma, which lasted for nine days. She was slowly weaned off the paralytic and sedation meds until she was fully awake and aware of all that had taken place.

Tricia remained on the vent in the hospital for over four months as she slowly regained some of her strength. On February 22, less than seven weeks after giving birth, Tricia was listed and activated on the double lung transplant list. She was given a high score but was told that new lungs may be difficult to find because her blood type was very rare. In the meantime, she was walking nearly a mile everyday (with the help of a vent and a walker), visiting Gwyneth for just a few minutes each day.

On April 2, my 27th birthday, we got the call that changed our lives forever. Tricia was going to receive a second chance at life. That night, and throughout the early-morning hours of the next day, Tricia underwent the nine hour surgery to replace her old, sick lungs with a new, healthy pair.

As of July 4, 2008:

Gwyneth Rose spent over eighteen weeks in the NICU. On May 15, we finally brought her home (to our hotel in Durham). Although she still needs a small amount of O2 and remains on several medications to help her premature body grow, she continues to do incredibly well, with no major setbacks. She has amazed everyone, including her nurses and doctors. She is being fed formula, and, although she is very small for her age as a former micro-preemie, she is now growing at a very fast pace and is well over 6 lbs. Gwyneth is the joy of our hearts and a smiling baby, and we can't wait to introduce her to the all of the things that God has given us in this beautiful world!


Tricia is recovering very well from the transplant surgery. After less than three weeks in the hospital, she was finally discharged from the hospital on April 22 and is now back in physical therapy for a few weeks as she continues to gain strength. While there have been no signs of infection or rejection, she has been diagnosed with Post-Transplant Lymphoma, and is currently undergoing treatments. She is taking to her long awaited roll as a mother with as much joy, grace and determination as she approaches everything in her life.


I had literally been living at the hospital with Tricia since December, spending most of my time in Tricia's room and making several visits with Gwyneth every day, sleeping most nights at Tricia's feet, and only returning to our hotel for a little sleep and to spend some time with our dog, Meka. Tricia's mother, Agnes has been here with us for most of that time as well, and much of our family (from NC and NJ) has been spending lots of time with us here whenever they are able.

Tricia and I are slowly returning to a more normal sense of life. We are incredibly excited to have Gwyneth home, and are enjoying our lives as full-time parents. We finally returned home to the OBX in early June, and are currently looking to buy our first home. We are enjoying the summer with our families, and I am getting back into the swing of things at work.

We are forever grateful to the donor and his/her family for making the decision to give Tricia a chance to be a mother and wife (not to mention and daughter, sister, granddaughter, niece and aunt) for several more years.

We are also humbled to have this opportunity to allow God to use our story to show Himself and bring our passion for awareness of and support for Cystic Fibrosis, Organ Donation and Premature Birth to the minds and hearts of even more compassionate people.

Thank you for reading our story, and feel free to check back in as we update the blog often. Also, take advantage of the links on the right-hand sidebar to find out even more about our story.

Nate, Tricia and Gwyneth Rose


Latest Pics

With life getting busy with life, it's harder to find time to take lots of pics, which is a good thing, IMO. Here are a few pics of the past week.







BTW, Gwyneth is still on the nasal cannula, but we take it off every now and then to keep the skin on her face from becoming irritated...for some reason, most of our pics of her recently are without the O2. I don't have much else to update about her because we haven't had any appointments the past few weeks, but we have several coming up, so check back in to find out how she's doing.

Thanks!

Nate

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Commitment

This past Sunday, our family participated in a parent/child dedication ceremony at church. We don't baptize infants, nor do we dedicate children by themselves. The dedication is mostly for the parents of a child. We have committed to raising Gwyneth in a home that is centered on God's love for her. My favorite part of our dedications is when we ask the entire church body to stand with us and pray, signifying that they are supporting us over the next several years in our journey together.

Here are a few pics from the day.





Nate

Sunday, June 29, 2008

Kirschner Family Vacation (Day 7)

I had to work all day/evening on Thursday and Friday, so I missed all of the fun, but here are a few pics from Saturday, the last full day at the beach house with everyone.









Nate

Friday, June 27, 2008

Today

Four years ago today, I married the most incredible woman on the face of the planet. These past four have been an adventure far beyond description or comprehension. I can't even begin to put into words, but I think these next few pics say it all....





If you'd like to say "Happy Anniversary" with more than words (and we totally appreciate the words!), please consider donating to my Personal CF Great Strides Fundraising Goal (click "click to donate" at the bottom of the linked page) to help insure that the three of us also get to spend our 5th anniversary healthy and together.

Thanks!

Nate

Monday, June 23, 2008

Kirschner Family Vacation (Day 1)

Here are a few of my favorite pics from the first day of the big beach vacation week. 22 people (including what seems like 37 kids under the age of 5) in the immediate Kirschner family (although, most of us have different last names), everyone but us and the parents and Frank sleeping at the beach house (and by "beach house" I mean a ginormous house about 100 yards from the ocean). Unfortunately, Don, Frank and I have to work during the week, so we'll miss lots of the fun, but I'm sure I'll be hanging over there every evening. Tonight, if the weather is cooperating and everyone is in a good mood, we'll walk over the dunes and take some fun family pics.

Gwyneth hanging with Aunt Janet.
Cousin Ja. eats more food than I do. Seriously.
Same hair, different cousin.
Getting to know Cousin Bry.
Cousin L. smiles every time she sees my camera.
Cousin Bri. & my favorite pic of the day.
Cousin Je.
I'm basically her favorite uncle.
She's not laughing...she's stuffing rice crispies into her mouth...
...and trying to keep them there.
Out on the deck.

Nate

Saturday, June 21, 2008

The White Rose Guitar

Doyle Dykes is one of the most respected fingerstyle guitarists in the world. My dad and I got to hear him play a few years back in Southern CA before either of us knew who he was. Simply amazing.

Taylor Guitars partnered with Doyle several years ago to create a personalized guitar for Doyle based on his own specifications...the Taylor Doyle Dykes Signature Model Guitar. They began producing Doyle's guitar in "black" and "natural" (colors) for the public shortly after.

Beyond his specific musical, electronic and stylistic requests, the most identifiable feature of Doyle's guitar is the white rose of mother of pearl inlaid in the guitar head. Everywhere Doyle travels, he always plays a song he wrote for his daughter called "White Rose for Heidi". Before playing the song, he tells the following story...

When my oldest daughter, Heidi, was four years old, I asked if she wanted anything special from God. We were saying our bedtime prayers. She replied, "Yes Daddy, there is one thing I've been thinking about." "What is that?" I asked. "A rose," she said. "I'd like God to bring me a rose."

The next day, I'd forgotten about it. That night at prayer time, she again asked, "Daddy, how come God didn't bring my rose today?" I felt bad, as well as bewildered. I was really at a loss for words. Suddenly, I said, "Well, maybe you need to tell Him what color rose you want." She said, "Oh, well I've been thinking about a white one." We then asked God to deliver a white rose for Heidi.

The next night, after a concert a few hours away, a little lady, who apparently was "special," walked up to me after everyone had left. She asked, "Are you Doyle Dykes?" "Yes," I replied. "God told me to bring you something from my garden today." She handed me what I thought to be carrots or some other vegetable from her garden that was wrapped in aluminum foil. "Thank you, I'll enjoy eating this," I said. She giggled like a child and said, "Uh...You'd better open it."

I peeled back the aluminum foil to find a beautiful, solitary "White rose for Heidi
."

A little over a year ago, on the second Sunday of June, my church presented me with a gift of money that they had collected, telling me to buy a new guitar. I've had the same guitar that my parent's bought for me as a Christmas gift about 15 years ago. It's been a solid, wonderful guitar for many years, but has never been something that was well suited for use on stage, especially in our church building playing with our band...in fact, I've been using a borrowed guitar on Sunday mornings for the past year (thanks, Rich!).

My dream has always been to own a Taylor guitar, and the church's gift not only allowed me to buy a Taylor, but to buy one that I would never need or want to replace.

However, partly because I'm lazy, but partly because I knew owning a new Taylor would be as much a curse as a blessing while we lived in Durham (because I would not have been able to play it very much), I put off making the purchase.

All this past year, Tricia has been bugging me about buying the guitar, but I've just been reluctant to do so until we were home again. I shopped quite a bit, looking for exactly what I wanted to buy...I just never bit the bullet. A few months back, after Gwyneth was born, I remembered Doyle and the story he told about his white rose guitar, and mentioned to Tricia how it would be cool to own one of those guitars. We even looked up a few on the internet.

About a month ago, she began telling me about how cool my Father's Day gift was going to be. I couldn't imagine anything better than her Christmas Gift and Birthday Gift for me this past year. But in the back of my mind I thought that maybe she was trying to get my guitar for me, which was a little scary because I knew the specifications I wanted, and I knew that Tricia didn't know much about guitars.

Despite my best efforts, including some intense questioning when she was coming out of sedation the other day (haha), she wouldn't tell me, even when father's day came and went last week. All she would say is that it was the best ever and that it was waiting for me when we got home.

Well, needless to say, Tricia is basically the best wife ever. She found a brand new, natural white rose guitar for an incredible price. She and my mom had it laying open in it's case for me when we got home yesterday, just in time for me to drool for a few minutes before packing it up and taking it to band practice. It is just about the most beautiful guitar in the world, it sounds incredible (especially compared to my old guitar), and it has some very rich and sentimental significance to me (hi, Gwyneth Rose!).

So, without further ado, here are a few pics of my new White Rose Guitar...




I've named her Emma Claire (or, E-Claire, for short).

I have a few more pics of the guitar posted on my Photo Blog. I'll let Tricia post, on her blog, the pics of me actually seeing it for the first time (I'll let you know when she does that).

A HUGE thank you to my Nags Head Church family...I pray that I can use your beautiful gift to continue worshipping God with you for many years to come!

And, here is a video of Doyle himself playing his beautiful song, "White Rose for Heidi".



Thanks!

Nate


Friday, June 20, 2008

Good 24 Hours

Tricia's first chemo treatment went very well. No side effects except for a slight temperature rise which she didn't even notice. We're hoping that they'll allow us to do the remainder of her 4 week treatment somewhere closer to home instead of having to drive to Durham once a week of the next month. She was released shortly after the injection was done, and we spent a good night at the hotel before heading home yesterday.

Gwyneth is doing very well with extra O2 and meds. Her breathing is back to normal, and she is able to eat more...we're guessing she's probably up to 6.5lbs now...I'm taking her to grocery store to weigh her on the deli scale later today...

Our trip yesterday went very well. Got off around 11:30 and arrived at my parents' house by 3:30. Gwyneth did very well...we only had to make one pit stop this time. It's good to be home again, and we're praying hard that we won't need to go back to Duke for more than a one-day outpatient appointment for the next few months.

When we arrived home Tricia had my belated father's day gift waiting for me...I won't tell you what it is yet, but if you check in tomorrow morning, I promise I'll have pics and and stories to tell about it. I can promise you that it's basically the coolest father's day gift any dad has ever gotten, so don't miss it!

I also picked up Meka yesterday (thanks, again Don and Frank!!!), and hopefully she's with us full-time again, as long as we can keep from any extended trips to Duke. She doesn't seem too interested in Gwyneth right now, which is fine with us because she can be high energy and a little reckless when she gets excited. Ralphie is still hanging with Grandma until we get a place of our own...I think they're both pretty happy with that arrangement.

To top it all off, I got to practice with the band last night for just the second time since December, which is always one of the highlights of my week!

I have some family in town...my uncle and aunt and cousin...we're going to hang out with them tonight. Tricia's family begins to trickle in late tonight and throughout the weekend. She's looking forward to spending lots of time with them all at the beach house they've rented for the week and introducing everyone to outside-of-the-hospital Gwyneth. I'm looking forward to getting a full week's worth of work at the church, and hanging with the Kirschner clan in the evenings!

Anyway, that's a quick update. I've been so busy the past few weeks, that I haven't had a chance to take many pictures, but I promise this next week will produce a lot of new and fun pics. Here are a few pics of Gwyneth and I goofing around with the Mac a few days ago.









Thanks!!!

Nate

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Father's Day Repost

I thought I'd repost this video, as it was my greatest father experience to date.

video
("Safe And Sound" by Matthew West)

Watch all of the CFHusband videos Here!

Nate

Dads

I believe that, perhaps, the most influential factor of being a great dad is having a great dad. Fortunately, I have had 27 years of that kind of influence.


I'm pretty sure that Tricia has been just as fortunate.


Thanks to everyone who has/is wishing me a happy first father's day! I really appreciate it! Make sure you check out Tricia's Blog Post from early this morning.

Thanks!

Nate

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Sleepy or Sneaky?

You decide...

Nate

Friday, June 13, 2008

Update and Pics

Tricia's surgery has been bumped back a few hours, which means it's less likely to happen today. We're praying that it will happen.

Here are a few pics from the past several days...

Change, Feed and Burp Pit Stop on the Road...


Eskimo Kisses...
Loving on Mommy...
Nate

Thursday, June 12, 2008

More of Meka

These are from last Sunday.

Looking for Cats...

Hanging with Tricia...
Meeting Miss Gwyneth...
Nate

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Update (10:10pm, Wednesday)

First, thank you so much for your prayers and encouragement the past few days. To see well over 800 people leave a comment saying that they're thinking of us today is incredibly encouraging, and we deeply appreciate it (plus, that sets a new CFHusband record for number of comments under one post!)!

Gwyneth is doing well...up to 6lbs 3.5oz as of yesterday afternoon! Her O2 saturation and heart rate are good, but not great. Basically, her body is growing faster than her lungs, making them work a little too hard, as they are still underdeveloped. She is now on an incredibly small amount (so small, that I can't feel or hear it come out of the tank) of O2 (via a nasal cannula) for most of the day/night, just to give her lungs a little less to do on their own. She's also back on a med that she was taken off of a few weeks ago that should help as well. We've already noticed a visible difference since yesterday afternoon, which is good.

The docs say she looks great. It's important for her lungs to continue to develop, and for her to get this extra help from the O2 and meds because, if she's expending less energy breathing, she's using more energy eating and growing.

Tricia had her PET Scan this afternoon. Nothing too scary about it except for being told to clear your mind for a few hours while lying awake in a very small space... The results of the scan should show any tumors that might be forming in her body. I believe we'll hear about the results tomorrow.

She'll have a bronchoscopy and, hopefully, a successful biopsy of her lungs. If the biopsy is not successful, they will have to do a surgical biopsy, which means cutting her open, which she would is very apprehensive about (so, please, pray that the bronch biopsy is successful). I believe that we should have a fairly comprehensive diagnosis once the results of the scan, bronch and biopsy are all in, which may not be until Friday.

She was admitted early this evening, and is already sleeping in her hospital bed. She's bummed because she expected to be on her normal inpatient floor (which feels like home to us, and where they know her and her needs better), but there were no empty beds, so she's on am unfamiliar floor. I'm spending this first night with her, while Agnes (Tricia's mom) is with Gwyneth back at the hotel. You can pray that we all sleep well tonight and that Tricia will be moved to her favorite floor.

Tricia feels great, and, if the doctors weren't telling us that something was wrong, we would have no idea. Although she has EBV (mono), it's not the same as if you or I were to have what we know as mono. She has yet to be given an IV or anything else that she wouldn't have at home, and we haven't really been told what will happen over the next few days if she is diagnosed with something, which basically means that we're really not sure why Tricia isn't sleeping in her own bed tonight...at least, a little frustrating.

As I walked through the hospital lobby earlier this evening and entered the elevator, I thought to myself, for a brief second, that I should stop by the NICU on the way up to Tricia's room to see Gwyneth. Just a few minutes later, as I entered Tricia's room, I almost stopped myself because I didn't feel the gown on my back and gloves on my hands. And just now, as the nurse walked out of the room, I noticed how skinny Tricia's charts were (compared to the encyclopedia she ended up with by the end of her last stay). I can distinctly remember that last time I used the label "hospital" for one of my posts, thinking that it would be a long time before I added another post to that label... All that to say, it feels very strange being here now, especially considering how far Tricia and Gwyneth are removed, medically, from their last times as patients here.

We are praying with you that our stay will be short because the diagnosis will come back negative for anything major. We're also praying that God will show us why we are here this time...the last stay, while incredibly long and exhausting, still felt natural for us in a lot of ways. This visit simply does not.

In the meantime, we'll be patient and continue to know that we're exactly where God wants us, even if it makes no sense right now. Thanks again for your prayers, and thanks for your continued prayers over the next few days as we wait to hear the news.

Nate

Monday, June 9, 2008

Plans

It seems that our story is far from over.

We received a call from Duke this past Wednesday that the Epstein Virus (Mononucleosis) has been found in Tricia's system. This in and of itself is not necessarily a horrible thing, but on Thursday we received another call telling us that there are some growths in Tricia's lungs. These growths could be the first signs of a common type of cancer called Post-Transplant Lymphoproliferative Disorder that develops in post-transplant patients, brought on by the mono virus because of the immunosuppressant drugs Tricia is now taking.

We'll be driving to Duke early Tuesday (tomorrow) morning to get a clinic visit in for Gwyneth, who has been breathing a little heavy and fast the past few days. It does not appear to be affecting her in any way, but it's something that needs to be checked out just in case.

Tricia has a PET Scan early Wednesday morning. She will probably also have a biopsy (where they'll remove a small part of her lungs). Hopefully this can be done via a bronchoscope. If not, they may need to perform a surgical biopsy. She'll most likely be admitted as an in-patient on Wednesday as well, hopefully for no more than a few days.

They should have a diagnosis within 24 hours of the biopsy.

If she indeed is diagnosed with PTLD, they will consult their oncology specialists to take over administering the Rituximab, which it is generally given weekly for a month or so.

It could all just be a fungus infection, but it appears pretty suspicious for the PTLD.

This is not something we were aware could happen (not that anything really surprises us anymore), and to be honest, we really don't know much about it or what could happen from here. The idea of going back to Duke and being in the hospital is not something that we really want to think about right now, as it really messes with our plans. We're not sure how long we'll be in Durham, but we're hoping we'll be back within a week.

So, once again, we find ourselves in an unfamiliar, and very scary place. But, if we have learned anything during this incredible journey, we’ve learned to simply trust God.

When I am at my weakest, He makes His strength most evident.

I'm believing more and more that, after this part of our journey is over, God will still be Who He is, no matter the outcome. My plans are only worth anything if they are God's plans, and thankfully, His plans are always perfect.

Jeremiah 29:11 (The Message)

I'll show up and take care of you as I promised
and bring you back home.
I know what I'm doing.
I have it all planned out -
plans to take care of you,
not abandon you,
plans to give you the future you hope for.


We have no reason to doubt that God is still in control. Thanks for your thoughts and prayers this week. I'll let you know when we know more about both of the girls.

Thanks!

Nate

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Back on the OBX!!!

New Pics!

Here are a few new pics to keep you busy while we drive home. :)









Nate

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

To All Our OBX Friends...

We can't tell you how much we're looking forward to seeing you and introducing you to our Gwyneth Rose! I don't think we've looked forward to anything more than the day we drive home to the OBX after this long journey!

Unfortunately, because of the precarious health of both the girls, they won't be able to spend much time with you all for a while, yet. Tricia literally has no immune system, meaning that the smallest bug could get her extremely sick with no way of fighting it off on her own. Because Gwyneth is still so small and still developing, she also is at great risk (more than most newborns) of becoming extremely sick. If either one of them were to become sick, it would probably mean another stay in the hospital, and it could mean a lot worse.

Fortunately, the summer is the easiest time to stay healthy. So, we kindly ask you for a few things over the next several months to help us make the transition back to a healthy, normal life...

1) You probably won't see much of Gwyneth and Tricia out in public, crowded places for at least a few more months, including at church. When you do see us out in a public/crowded place, please, resist the temptation to give a hug or even shake a hand (including with me). Feel free to come up to us and talk...again, we can't wait to see you! I don't mind being the bad guy, and Tricia is getting good at cutting people off before they can make that contact, so don't be hurt if we seem less friendly (physically) than we normally would. Remember that, even if you're not sick, and even if you just washed your hands, you still have the potential to pass on any germs you may have picked up from anything or anyone that you have touched.

2) If you have been sick within a week leading up to seeing us, please, stay far away, even in a large, public place. I don't mind having a yelling conversation with you from across the room if it's cool with you. This includes me, because if I get sick right now, it's not a fun thing for any of us.

3) If you're feeling healthy and clean, and you would like to hang out, please, let us know by phone or email. We do have to take precautions, but it doesn't mean we can't see you and hug you and hang out with you at home. We can have a pretty normal life away from those crowded places, and, again, we are really looking forward to hanging out. This may mean that you'll need to find a babysitter for your young children, but hopefully that's something we can make happen.

I think that's about it for now. As long as you understand why we have to be extremely careful for the time being as well as how you can help us stay healthy, we should be working our way toward getting back to a more normal life.

Have I mentioned we're excited to come home?!?

See you soon!

Nate

Thursday, May 29, 2008

New Favorite Pic!

Here is one of a series I just posted on my Photo Blog.

Nate

Cozy


Nate