Adoption and Offenses

Unfortunately, it's apparent to me that I need to clarify something I said in my Last Post (the one about the Chapman family). But, I've been meaning to write a few things about adoption, so this gives me a good excuse.

A few people have commented and emailed me about my use of the word "adopted" to identify the Chapman's youngest daughter, apparently having been, at least, slightly offended by my choice of words.

Firstly, I meant no offense. I doubt that anyone believes I purposely meant to offend, but just in case...

As most of you already know, Tricia is adopted. I also have several other family members and many, many friends who are adopted/adoptees/adopting. In fact, we were seriously considering adoption before Gwyneth came along, and may still consider it in the future. Tricia (and her family) are very open about the adoption of three of their six children...in fact, Tricia's adoption is a HUGE part of her story and our story.

In my humble opinion, adoption is one of the most beautiful acts of love that we as humans can show to anyone. It is, perhaps, the most incredibly tangible reflection of the love of God we can witness on this earth (as He has chosen to "adopt" us into His kingdom), and I know that Tricia and so many others use their stories of adoption to show the story of God to others, just as the Chapman family has done. Even if you don't believe in God, it is always an incredible gift of love and life. I respect that some choose to keep adoption a secret (when it is possible), but I don’t understand it, especially in light of the incredible miracle that it truly is.

I also recognize that there are a lot of adoptive families who read my blog every day. My hope is, by recognizing that Maria is adopted, even those who aren't familiar with the Chapman family will take the time to stop and pray/think about them. I also pray that those who have never given adoption much thought might see this story and consider the miracle that it is.

Perhaps, with posting the picture of the Chapman family (which I added to the post later), it was unnecessary to specifically spell it out, but I consider it an important part of their lives, and an important reason to pray for them now. I can only imagine that the loss of any child is too difficult for words.

I find it discouraging that people are so easily offended (several other people left comments like your email under that post) when my post was meant to do nothing more than ask that you remember the Chapman family. I am not hurt or offended, but, I also continue to find it amazing that every single one of my posts has the potential make somebody feel offended...I've even had a few angry comments/emails about my pictures-only posts... The only way for me not to offend anyone on this blog to have never started it in the first place, which of course, is not something I'm sorry for.

I’ll be the first to stand in line and say that I’m offended by things that weren't meant to be offensive, and I’m attempting to be more consistent in making the choice to not be offended (because, most of the time, we're only offended because we choose to be).

Again, I meant no offense, and I took lengths to make sure that I posted about the Chapmans with sensitivity. I am sorry that a few of you were offended by my words, or least felt enough emotion to tell me about it. I hope you’ll understand my position and motives, and that you’ll consider thinking the best of me next time you’re tempted to be offended by something I write.

To all those adoptive families who read my blog, thank you so much. Without adoption, neither Tricia nor Gwyneth would be in my life right now.

Thanks!

Nate