Sunday, February 10, 2008

The Story of Us (Part 5)

(Part 1)
(Part 2)
(Part 3)
(Part 4)

(This is the part of the story that is a bit of a blur and will go at a fast pace 'cause there isn't much to tell)


Over the next several weeks, I, thinking our first date to be a smashing success, began emailing back and forth with Tricia and calling her on the phone on occasion. We hung out a few more times over weekends through that early autumn.

One weekend, in early October, while the weather is always still warm and beautiful on the OBX, I borrowed a two seat kayak from my sister's workplace (hey KHK!) and took Tricia kayaking in the canals around her neighborhood. That was a good day. As I think back on this day (and others), I think how fortunate we were that Tricia could do these things, and how much we took them for granted...

We continued to hang out every few weeks all throughout the fall and winter months...all the while, my feelings for Tricia grew deeper. Her love for life and God, her amazing energy and spirit despite her illness, her incredible physical beauty...all of these things were, quite simply, moving my heart toward a very deep love. And, all the while I was unable/unwilling to tell her about all of my feelings for her, not knowing exactly how she felt about me, and not wanting to risk a growing friendship.

In December, I made the decision to take some time off from school...after 3 semesters at two different schools, I just did not have a clear picture of what I was supposed to be doing. I was still leading worship at the church, and I felt a growing sense that this might be what I was created to do, but I simply needed a break from school to figure it all out. 2001 started off with a sense of new beginnings for me, and I had high hopes for that my pursuit of Tricia would be rewarded.

Tricia was still finishing up the last of her high school (homeschool) classes, and by this time she had begun working at a local veterinarian/kennel (she has always loved animals). I was living with my parents again, and of course, this meant that I could see more of Tricia.

But, as winter began to warm into spring, I began to have the growing feeling that Tricia was not warming to my very obvious interest in her. I was pursuing her with all that I had, but I wasn't getting much feedback from her. We certainly enjoyed our time together, but I didn't have any proof that she was feeling the same as I...I was always the one who called and emailed or suggested that we do something together. I wasn't certain if it was simply her personality to not initiate anything, or if she was really not wanting anything more than what we had already...

By March, I was getting a frustrated. I had invested a lot of my heart into showing Tricia my feelings (again, without telling her as much), and it was becoming very evident that she was not interested.

By April, I made the decision to completely back off and stop the pursuit. I figured, by this point, that Tricia must know about my feelings for her...and, she had my phone number and knew how to get a hold of me if she decided to do so. I wasn't playing hard to get...I just decided that if IT was going to happen, I needed to just step back and let it.

That April was not an easy month for me...

Nate

21 comments:

Amy said...

Oh! I hope that Part 6 is not far behind. I am anxious for the rest of the story.

Leslie said...

Oh no! Not another cliff hanger!You have us at the edge of our seats! Like Amy, I too am anxious to hear the rest of your beautiful love story! Thanks so much for sharing it with us.
With constant prayer and love,
Leslie

Kate said...

That sounds like such a heart-rending time for you, Nathan. I'm hoping that the next installment of your story details how Tricia did, in fact, adore you, but hadn't realized the depths of your feelings for HER.

I must say, too, that it makes me smile to read how you talk about your wife ~ it is obvious how much you love her and that is an awesome thing to see.

Can't wait for part 6! :-)

Dana D said...

Can't wait to read more! You've got me hooked!

Jayne said...

Arghh!! You can't leave it there. I was just getting into it..

Best wishes to you all this week.

Anonymous said...

Tricia and Nate, please see the video on this pastor's web site. He had CF polio etc but his heart, his heart was from God. Amazing, you'll agree.

http://www.davebusby.com/

Meagan Johanna said...

I'm so anxious to hear the rest of the story. Both from your point of view and Tricia's! :D

I hope you guys have a great Sunday and I'll be praying for you as always!

Anonymous said...

Don't leave us hanging:)

Julie said...

Even though I know how the story...well, I can't send "ends", because it's not over yet...um...even though I know where the story is as of right now, I'm still on the edge of my seat waiting for the next installment! You are a good storyteller - and Gwyneth is going to give you ample opportunities to use those storytelling skills, so hone them now!!

Anonymous said...

OH MY GOSH
I AM ON THE EDGE OF MY SEAT
& I MUST SAY IT CONTINUES TO BE THE GREATEST LOVE STORY I HAVE HEARD IN A VERY LONG TIME...
IF NOT THE GREATEST LOVE STORY
I HAVE EVER HEARD
YOU SURE ARE ONE HECK OF A STORY TELLER NATHAN
WHEN EVER YOUR READY FOR PART SIX I WILL STILL BE SITTING ON THE EDGE OF MY SEAT =) =)
AS ALWAYS PRAYING FOR YOU THREE AND YOUR FAMILIES
L.I.N.Y.

Bo from Florida said...

What the heck?????

And the rest of the story...

I know you're a tad bit busy these days but c'mon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Blessedw4mom said...

Nate, do like to leave us hanging??? I guess we know how things ended up but that is a terrible place to make us wait :-)

Anonymous said...

You do weave a good story..keep using it for HIs glory!
A

Amy B. said...

Aaaahhhh! You've left us hanging! Can't wait to hear more of the story which we already know has a wonderful, beautiful ending...but we still need to know what happens next!!! :)

Continued prayers for you and your girls.

Christy said...

I love that you two are blogging your history. This is going to be great for your sweet baby girl to see when she is older.

Always praying for you guys.

ommie said...

I thought she was looking bigger, then i read the rest of the blog and i am so happy to hear of her weight gain! Go Girl! That is great that all of you were able to spend some time together! You do a great job telling your family's story, i just wanted to say thank you. Each time you etch more of your story into a piece of my heart. I will continue to keep all of you in my thoughts and prayers! I feel blessed to have been touched by your story.

Anonymous said...

No fair...a real cliffhanger! Is that any way to treat your loyal readers. Looking forward to the nest part.

Sara said...

I do love cliff hangers, cheers mate for sharing, xx

wereart said...

I bet only God knew in April that Tricia was meant to be a big part of your life in May. Right??????

walkingbyfaith said...

:D I love yours and Tricia's story...it's like reading a book. :) It's so intriguing.

I can only imagine how hard it was for you to back off and wait. I am definitely not a patient person. :)

Ok..off to catch up on the other posts I've missed.

Love to you, Trish, & Gwyn.

The Smith Family said...

Good Afternnon- The baby is so beautiful with the bow in her hair and the blanket someone obviously made with lots of love. I am so encouraged by reading this blog- You have raised awareness in my for CF. I am truely thankful for this. I think and pray for your guys often. Im not too far away actually and have thought of stopping in to visit but I dont want to intrude. Is it acceptable fo either of you to receive visitors (that you may not have met before?) Trisha mentioned that she was "cultured" by going to several types of churches- I am curious what they were- as I too have been in several. I praise God for people like you guys- May God Bless you today.